I was going through my feed reader and I came across this question on Dr. Yoni Freedhoff’s blog Weighty Matters:
“Looking at your life – time, stress, health, work, home, kids, mood, etc. – is now a good time to try to affect change?“
Looking at my life the answer is pretty obvious: No.
My stress levels, my home, kids, and definitely my mood.
This summer I have the time and my health requires change. But no. The strength is missing.
Dr. Freedhoff says in efforts to make changes you need to respect reality. I need to take a step back and respect reality. Stop living in fear.
Right now life is all being easily overwhelmed, bursting into tears without warning, trying to make it through the days.
This summer, once about professional and personal development is now about getting back to some semblance of normal in time to get everything I can out of my Masters program.
I will try to focus moment to moment, making good decisions when I can, trying not to think ahead to my convocation in two weeks.
When I graduated in 2007 my mother, sister and fiancé were all there, sitting and watching me. And when I was up on stage I saw my father at the very back, standing, watching me too. So this year I know I will be looking for him, and trying not to think about it, and trying not to burst into tears.
So, moment to moment. The world goes round and round.