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The friend zone

January 25th, 2015 | Posted by Amy Boughner in Parenting

First the kid’s friends were the kids of my friends. Then her friends were kids she went to preschool with, none of whom has ended up at her current school. Also she seems to remember very little about her year in preschool – I’ll mention one of her friends and she’ll look at me and said “who?”

Three was such a long time ago.

Now we have entered the world of junior kindergarten, which is a whole new thing. She takes the bus to school instead of me picking her up and I don’t have duty days to spend in her classroom. This year all I really know about her friends is the names she repeats most often. And I haven’t met most of the parents.

But it dawned on me one day that her JK friends could be her friends for at least the next few years, possibly for life if she finds really good ones – which she seems to have.

I have now learned the importance of the class list, because I lost our copy and am totally helpless when the kid asks for a playdate. I also have no way of touching base with the parents of the little girl that our little girl seems to have regular misunderstandings with.

 

The drama, it starts early.

Sometimes I miss the times when I got to pick who she played with based on which parents I wanted to hang out with…

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But it is nice to see her forming her own bonds and figuring out what she likes about other people and what maybe she doesn’t like. There are a whole lot of social lessons to learn – that not all friends are good friends, that sometimes someone might think they’re being funny but they’re not and maybe they just don’t realize.

It’s a world I still find difficult to navigate and I have to help her through it.

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