I’ve read arguments on both sides of letting your child cry it out, putting themselves to sleep. I have avoiding talking about the subject publicly because moms have a tendency to attack moms – something that’s been talked about by many people in the past.

But frankly, I don’t care how you get your kids to sleep and I don’t care what you think about what works for us.

We have tried all sorts of different “right ways” to get our daughter to sleep at night. I have talked to our own doctor and a pediatrician she referred us to. I have read books, I have talked to friends. I have spend countless hours questioning myself and trying new tactics.

She refuses to sleep. She is just like me. She doesn’t want the day to end, she doesn’t want to miss anything, she can’t wind down at the end of the day. We do stories, she has a snack, I talk to her, Daddy sings to her, we say goodnight.

And then she yells and screams and bangs on the wall and throws things around her room. We wait 10 minutes, we go in and calm her, we leave and then wait another 10 minutes. Lately it has been taking hours at a time. Blame the full moon, blame the changing season, blame the fact that she’s a so-called spirited child.

She hasn’t napped regularly since she was just under a year old. There have been several nights in her life when she hasn’t slept all night and into the afternoon of the next day.

With my husband travelling I have been spending three hours in the evening fighting with my daughter, trying to keep my composure and desperate for her to just go to sleep. So now we’re starting the process again. We had been in a good place, we were having smooth bedtimes. I still don’t know exactly how we ended up back here.

We’re starting back at the beginning and she will be fine.

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