So, I’m broken.

I’m tired all the time but can’t sleep at night. I’m eating wrong and it’s hard to care. My PCOS is flaring up and I can feel its attack.

I need to fix me. I’ve said it before.

But having a toddler who is throwing her weight around makes everything just that much harder. I try to play with her and I get tired. I try to deal with her tantrums and I get emotional. It’s too hard.

So we need to design a plan wherein the kid gets what she needs (but not everything she wants) and I get what I need.

I need good fuel. I need to plan breakfasts and lunches and snacks and give up on this idea that I can have a Coke once in a while.

I need re-charging. There is a yoga studio not far from our place. They offer a $35 unlimited pass for one month for people new to the studio. I can get out of the house and do as much yoga as possible and feel that much better, body and soul, at the end of the month.

I need fresh air and fun. I need to work with my passions.

I want to go for walks, and play with my dog. I want to put aside my fears and maybe convince myself to go to the local writers’ group. I want to reconnect with friends. We had a ladies’ night last month and it was energizing and relaxing at the same time. I need to actually finish some of the knitting I’ve started lately.

I need to fix what is broken. I’ve said it before. I keep failing. How many times?

She tells me life is beautiful

I’d like to live it with her.

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