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Immodest

December 8th, 2010 | Posted by Amy Boughner in Issues | Parenting

Yesterday I opened my new Bitch Magazine and read an article about something called the Modesty Survey. This is a website, put together by two ‘Christian guys’ that allows ‘Christian girls’ to submit questions about what they wear and find out whether they are dressing immodestly.

And by immodestly, they mean they want to know if the clothes they are wearing arouses male attention.

Boys and men, from 17 to 50, can submit their answers to these questions, not to dictate what girls should be wearing – according to the survey’s home page – but merely to inform them that they are bringing on inappropriate thoughts in the boys and men around them. For example, one statement in the survey is “A one-piece swimsuit with shorts on top is modest.”

Forty-six per cent of respondents agree with the statement, but it seems that a majority agree that wearing shorts over a swimsuit demonstrates a girl’s desire to be modest, but if she were really modest she would also wear a loose t-shirt.

Here is what I have to say about this survey:

Any parent that teaches their son or daughter that women are responsible for controlling men’s urges is doing society a great disservice.

You are teaching your boys that it’s not their fault if they rape a girl because she must have been tempting him. You are teaching your girls that they must live in fear of stepping out of line or they will face this unwanted lust.

All this survey is, is justification for depraved men and a tool to tell girls who might become victims ‘hey, we warned you.’

My daughter will know and understand, as I do, that every person is responsible for their own actions, that she has the right to act and dress any way she wants – so long as she’s not infringing on anyone – and that no matter what she chooses to wear no one has the right to hurt her, or touch her without permission.

No one else can dictate who she is and who she can be.

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