I like to exercise. I do. I like to work and get sweaty and feel my muscles. I don’t mind feeling sore for a couple of days – it reminds me that I can be strong.

My problem this time around is that I don’t know how to best exercise.

I’ve gone to the gym in the past, I’ve learned how to use weights properly and I like the treadmill, but they’re too expensive to have one at home right now – and I’m not willing to pay for a gym membership at the moment either, we’ve got too much else going on and time is also a factor.

I’ve gone to Booty Camp (not often enough, mind you) and I enjoy being in a class and feeling that group dynamic, but it’s too high impact for my bad knees, unless I add some serious stretching to make sure I don’t hurt myself. I enjoyed Booty Camp, and I would recommend it, but I won’t be continuing myself.

The last time I was very successful at losing weight I rode our exercise bike for at least 30 minutes almost every day. I’ve been trying to get on the bike but here are my excuses: I have a 10 month old who just started walking, sometimes she naps, and sometimes she doesn’t, often when she naps I spend my time cleaning up the house after her playtime, trying to get things back in order, trying to get things done without distractions. I also often don’t have much time for a shower, and sometimes when she naps, all I want to do is nap.

I love taking her for walks. I like being outside, she likes being outside, but lately everything just seems that much more complicated. It’s getting colder, so we cleared out the garage so we can put the car in, which means that the stroller is often trapped at the back of the garage and I would have to move the car to get to it. The dog’s back legs are still weak. He has a limp and he’s very jumpy, so I don’t know how he’ll handle long walks, but I don’t want to go for a walk and leave him at home, so often we take him and go for shorter walks.

I want to like running. I feel as though I could really benefit, but it’s another exercise that I try and I feel weaker for it. I tried the Couch to 5K program three times and I never finished the first run. The main thing holding me back on this is embarrassment. I don’t want to go out running on the street and not be able to do it. If I go out when it’s light out I’ll have to at least take the baby, and our bulky stroller, if I wait until Joe gets home I’ll be going out in the dark.

I want to exercise, I want to lose weight and feel healthier, I want to free myself of excuses, but everywhere I turn I feel like I’m facing a road block.

Last week I went to my doctor, and I talked to her about some of the problems I was facing being sick and taking care of the baby while Joe was out of town. She told me “That’s motherhood, sometimes you just have to push through.”

Maybe I just need to take that to heart and push through – it can only get easier once I start. Right?

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